Would God Have to Kill Trump to Save the United States?

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Amidst the cacophony of the new administration in the White House, there is one thing we know for sure: most Republicans are unpatriotic – 1) that is not a typo 2) it’s not something I say lightly or to insult 3) I discussed this topic here in this blog many times.

To their defense, most of them confuse to be a citizen with to be a patriot (Read “Where Are the Patriots?” for a primer on the topic).

Even when faced with FACTS regarding their bad choices, they become argumentative, confrontational and at times physically violent. Their leaders – GOP Powerbrokers, the Elites, the Legislators – although they know better and could have guided them to make better decision but unfortunately they are self-serving morons; they too cannot be relied on to help steer the country in the right direction.

I spent a great deal of time during the primaries warning the country about Trumpageddon but it’s obvious all warnings fell on deaf ears; today, the rest of the country – the world perhaps – braces for a Trumpageddon era where “it will get worse before it gets much worse” is the new adage.

It’s not difficult to imagine Donald Trump would challenge God, if he hasn’t done so already. Mr. Trump is after all the only one capable of fixing everything wrong everywhere in the Universe, though it is obvious to everyone but him that he is incapable of fixing his own life. But that’s beside the point.

In Trump’s book, God is not needed here in the United States or anywhere else in the world because, as you might have already heard or read, Mr. Trump is capable of straightening everything that’s wrong with the world. Had God not hurried to create mankind, Trump could have easily done that better. Too bad Trump wasn’t there in the very beginning. The Universe would have been more beautiful, and it would have cost him just a day or two. It took God six days according to the Bible, what a wimp! And Trump would not have needed any rest.

A conversation with Trump would reveal that God is weak – to be fair, Trump thinks everyone is – something which should give pause to all Christians – if there is any left (after all, most Republicans like to think of themselves as Christian) – before they ask God for any favor. If God is anything like Trump, he would not even talk to any “so-called” Christian – he would most likely insult them all – let alone to answer any of their prayers. God already knows that all the FAKE Christian Republicans would rather side with Trump. Besides, God would be too busy trying to figure out how best to faceoff with Trump without heaven getting wind of the fight.

If I were to be God’s advisor, I would encourage him to have a two-part plan in addition to an escape route; after all, he would face an adversary who is completely unpredictable, even to God.

1.- To make certain Fox Opinion – known and referred to by most as Fox News – is the only network allowed to televise the duel. A strategy which would benefit God since everybody in the Universe knows Fox is not a real news network; God can always claim deniability of any such fight.

2.- To be fully prepared for a “tweets’ assault” which could even bring down a “heavenship”.

Without an escape route, he would also be mobbed by Trump’s supporters who would rather have Trump than God. If God was wise enough to take my advice, he would use the escape route before he would get “mauled” by Trump’ supporters.

What If Donald Trump is killed by God? Heart attack, stroke, clogged arteries, choking on a pretzel, falling down the stairs, drowning in a glass of champagne or simply drop dead.

I know what you’re thinking, me too.

We’re not the only beings in the Universe who feel disgusted by Trump. He bullies everyone, curses those he doesn’t like, insults those who challenge his obnoxiousness and finds something wrong with anyone who doesn’t agree with him. He thinks of himself as the smartest person on the planet though it seems obvious he knows very little; he talks just for the sake of talking and accomplishes very little. He lies to everyone about everything.

Yes, God has a million reasons to take Donald Trump out of this planet. He is beyond repair; he is unrepentant and has most likely already brought God to tears. For the sake of the country, for the sake of future generations, may God act fast on this plan.

Amen!

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