Since we established in Part 2 the parameters on finding out whether your partner is cheating, let’s take a look at the technique. But first, let’s review two very important points 1) you must really, seriously decide ahead of time whether you want to stay in the relationship should your suspicion be correct, meaning your partner is cheating on you 2) you must decide methodically the best way to end the relationship (notice I said methodically; in other words, DO NOT let your emotions be the driving factor; have a roadmap). Most experts suggest you (NOT the allegedly cheating party) leave the house (or use item vi in Part 2) immediately after confirming your suspicion.
DO NOT under any circumstance let the cheating party convince you otherwise; it’s not going to end well the day the infidelity is found and the cheater is confronted. There are many examples of scenarios where one party either pretends to forgive or suggests being okay with the infidelity in order to find the opportunity – lower the other party’s guard – to punish the cheating b&*#! or the useless ass(&%$@. There are occasions when the punishment turned fatal, at times deadly. So, it is in the best interest of all parties to be in separate locations (preferably unknown to one another) after such revelation.
Now that you know what you should at least do before confronting your cheating partner, let me warn you about the most basic mistakes almost everyone (who was cheated on) has made, s/he wants to know whom their partner cheated with. Does it matter? Is cheating the problem? Or is it the person your partner cheated with? Does cheating with a stranger any better than with a friend? Although experts are baffled of the rationale provided by the victims, one thing is certain, nothing good comes out of finding out whom your partner cheated with.
The most common accomplices are co-workers, friends and occasionally family members; on rare instances would the accomplices be complete strangers. It is strongly advised NOT to inquire about the accomplice’s identity, even if you have already made up your mind to end the relationship. What do you think the conversation would be if it is a co-worker? How about if it is a very close friend? What would it be like if it is a family member?
If it is a close friend or a family member, you may already guess the immediate outcome. Not only would you have jeopardized your love’s relation (with your current [cheating] partner) but you would have also jeopardize friendship or alienated a family member. Don’t think for a minute you don’t need such individual because s/he’s done you wrong. That individual may have already realized how badly s/he messed up; s/he may feel overwhelmingly guilty to have betrayed you, to have breached the trust you both shared. But at the time you find out you’ve been cheated on, you need someone, a friend to talk to, to be there for you. The last thing you want to do is to alienate everybody, including that friend (or family member) who may be the accomplice.
So, unless the information is volunteered (without you asking), DON’T inquire about it. It’s bad enough to find out that the person you love, the person you trust, the person you sleep on the same bed with, the person you’ve shared everything with, has betrayed you. You need a friend, at the very least someone to talk to, to vent, even if that someone is unknowing to you the accomplice.
Betrayal does claim an emotional toll on its victims but fortunately the pain gradually fades away, at which point to find out that a close friend (or a family member) is the accomplice may not be as devastating as it would have been had you found out at the time of the confession of the infidelity. As obvious as it may be and as simple as it is to live by those guidelines in case of breach of trust, emotions usually run so high that most people are not cool-headed enough to try to look at the problem rationally. So, it is imperative you go through iterative mental exercises just in case of an unfortunate circumstance when you might have to deal with infidelity in your relationship. So, what is the simple technique to find out that your partner is cheating on you? Stay tuned as we will outline the simplicity of the technique in Part four.
Have you dealt with a cheating partner before?
How did you handle it?
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